Step on your fears, they’re stepping stones to your dreams

Some update as to my life in the last 2 weeks:
I made a leap of faith by choosing to do a detox, which I was scared to do, but I did it anyways. I made myself accountable to a couple of people, in which I was also scared to do. I broke up with food, meaning, I literally got rid of all the fake, perservative-filled, sugar-filled foods. This was the most difficult thing I’ve done, it took me by surprise how hard it was to do. I didn’t realize how connected I was to food!  I kid you not, I cried. Yes, I cried. I was scared to do this too, so many fearful thoughts ran through my head as I put everything in a bag for charity. I did it anyways. I knew I deserved this. You know what? I don’t regret it, and I am happier and healthier today because of it. Another thing that’s happened,  I chose to dream again. Yes, dream.  Upon having a deep convo with my friend (also my health coach), I chose to dream big. Maybe the dream isn’t so huge now that I’ve accepted it, but at first, I felt like I was so underqualified and undeserving that my goal at hand seemed out of reach!  I’ve also chosen to stand strong when people I love question my actions in regard to my health journey. I always used to be the person that cared too much about others oppinions. God’s approval is all we need! This also was a difficult choice. I cannot believe the amount of things that have happened in so short of time, and how much I’ve grown. Since making my first blog, and embarking on this journey full speed, I have lost 17+ lbs total and many inches. Since doing the detox and clean eating, as well as incorporating Zumba (my fav!), that’s where most of the weight dropped, about 10lbs of it! Why? Because I chose to step on that fear and used it to get closer to my goals. Had I not stepped out, I wouldn’t be as far as I am today. You know what else? Doing what’s right for you and feeling good about yourself enables you to show love to others. In the past, I was always a funny, bubbly person- when I wanted to be, which wasn’t all the time. Because I am loving myself, I can truly be a voice to other people. I am astonished at the people that are inspired by me- ME! This girl!
So, I say today, LOVE YOURSELF. do what you love. ACCEPT yourself.  Trash all the negative thoughts in your head and replace them with God thoughts, of how wonderful you are. We cannot be the change we wish to see if we don’t first work on our inner being. Do what makes you happy, and thrive on it. Stay focused and stand your ground.  Let your yes be yes, and your no be no. Refuse to make self-sabotaging moves. Step on that fear that’s holding you back, do it afraid!!  Life is what you make it, don’t let it pass you by!
-Amanda

Loving ME

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It’s so crazy that even tho God forgives us and puts aside our sins, we still hold them over our own head. As if to punish ourselves, at least that’s how I’ve always been with myself. Being nice, patient, forgiving, accepting and loving to ourselves should be so important. However, I don’t know about you, but for me, I’m horrible with myself! They say “we’re our own worst critic” and, it is so true. How can someone love me, if I don’t love me? How can I love someone else fully if I dont love myself fully? Sometimes, our outward reactions to people are mere reflections as to how we feel about ourselves. Why though? Why is it that other people have to take the brunt of it, when it’s really an inner thing that we’re unhappy with? Outward change won’t be successful without first beginning on what’s on the inside. Deal with the heart issues. Dare to question yourself. Learn yourself, and grow to love who you are in the time being, love your body while it’s changing. Treat yourself with utmost respect and love. Let me tell you, it’s not an easy road but it’s what you need to do. However and whatever that means for you. For me, my biggest thing is getting healthier. I used my weight over the last 7 years to hide behind, I didn’t want the gawks by all those dirty men, I wanted to be hidden because I was hurt and used by all the wrong people in my past. It sickened me and I stereotyped certain nationalities because of it. Just being honest!  However, through all that hiding, I was doing more than building a fatty wall, I was putting myself through more and more pain, slowly killing myself and choosing to be satisfied with it. I allowed everything in life to just move on a treadmil. Going, going, going, going, but no destination. Countless times putting a smile on and lying so well that I was “happy” that I actually believed it myself. So, when I turned 28(just a few months ago) there was a switch, an alert that went off and my limit had been reached. God told me it was time to come out of hiding, even at that time, I didn’t grasp the exact meaning of it, I knew somehow, it was time for some serious change. It was time I started to love myself how He loves me, flaws and all, as I am and to wake my faith back up and remind myself it was time to dream again, time to have some goals. I had to tell myself it was ok to do so, ok to dream, to release that fear, to reach out again, believe again. This Journey is NOT easy, BUT I am loving every moment. God has placed people in my life to help me, and some of these people don’t even realize that God is using them. It’s not alot of people, but I am ever greatful for each and every one, whether they’ve been in my life for years, or if they just barely came in my life within the last few months. Here’s to loving ME, and letting the real Amanda, who God truly created to shine, to blossom.

You Are My Lesson Learned

It’s still not easy, but, if what happened hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t have been awakened to things of which I was once asleep to. So, in an odd and weird way, thank you.

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Some things I’ve learned:
-When you have people in your corner (that love you deeply and root for you) that point out red flags in people or situations, DON’T brush it off. They obviously have wisdom and discern something that you don’t! Unfortunately, I brushed it off and had to see it for myself, which also came along with some hurt.
-What’s from God will never come in a rushed manner because if it’s a forever thing, why rush anything?
-What may seem like it’s everything you ever wanted, may just be a DISTRACTION.
-Don’t be so quick to think you’re ready, if the rest of your life isn’t put together.
-“Loose lips sink ships”, so goes the same as smooth words to the ear. Actions speak louder than words!
-God truly DOES know the desires of our heart, if the package is in the wrong wrapping paper, than it’s probably not yours!